The time came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk to blossom.

The comparative religion textbook never fails to affect me profoundly.

 

I have just finished reading the section on Theravada Buddhism, and I find myself intensely drawn to its teachings, concepts, practices and goals. I yearn to know simplicity, lack of lust and craving, blissful peace, unconditional compassion. I would like to live these things, explore them, learn them.

 

I’d like to live a monastic life, at least until I can stabilize myself internally, which in turn would allow me to stabilize externally.

 

 

 

Suddenly, I don't know why, I feel a bit uplifted. As if some subconcious load were dissolved, my thoughts and feelings no longer loaded with its onerous burden.

I exerted energy to respond to the affront. The dolt can't even spell - so how's the real dummy?

Tuesday or Wednesday I'll go in to talk to Shari about working more hours at Pangea. If that works out I'd like to go to Argentina over Spring Break because I have no idea when will be the next opportunity for me to go. :(

Maia and I spent the whole day outside. Multitudes of frogs are having their yearly (I think) orgy and making their abundant babies. I had never actually seen frogs puff out their chests and chirp so loudly. Maia and I fell into the lake.

I found a skull belonging to some sort of fairly large carnivorous animal, perhaps a dog.

I found bunches of chives, so we might make some kind of dip tonight and give some out to Joe, Lori, Paolo, Mr & Mrs Banfield, etcetera.

We found a magnificently fat old tree that we're going to fix the area up (it's dead twin is laying next to him, making it a dreary tree graveyard) and put a swing on it.
Maybe Livio will see how pretty our house is and decide not to sell it. I propose we just fix it up nice enough so that we can get good rent and cover the mortgage and then work off the rest in time.

Only time will tell.

To think that around the world there are people who believe that all beings are beautiful and worthy, care about everyone, and emanate acceptance and warm, loving wisdom is comforting like a quiet, bright smile; the fact that I could learn to live this way even more so.

I think about how my relationship with religion has changed over the past years and I see how much it has evolved. I used to be stolidly athiest, fervently sympathetic with communism's abolishment of the institution as the 'opium of the people.' Since I've studied sociology and comparative religion, however, I see that the hammer is not to blame for the destruction it causes. Religion is a part of culture, and culture a part of identity. This does not negate the fact that people for thousands of years have smothered their personalities, fomented ignorance, and slaughtered other people in the name of religion, but the course any tool or event takes depends solely on the person who utilizes it. I personally cannot agree with unthinking, unquestioning acceptance of anything but I cannot say anything for other people.

I hope this small insight will prevent me from convincing myself that what I believe is absolute and superior, as Livio frequently accuses me of doing.

Today I want to say namaste to every single being on earth.

My dad tried to convince me I'm jealous of my sister. When I let him know he was mistaken, he almost threw the pyrex out through the window.

No purpose, no waiting, no looking, no feeling, no knowing, no seeking.

Like holding one's breath but it doesn't matter because you don't need it.

I was beginning to feel complacent without any strong color or any meaningful words.

This is more like it.

1. "Myth of mental illness." Mental illness is a metaphor (metaphorical disease). The word "disease" denotes a demonstrable biological process that affects the bodies of living organisms (plants, animals, and humans). The term "mental illness" refers to the undesirable thoughts, feelings, and behaviors of persons. Classifying thoughts, feelings, and behaviors as diseases is a logical and semantic error, like classifying the whale as a fish. As the whale is not a fish, mental illness is not a disease. Individuals with brain diseases (bad brains) or kidney diseases (bad kidneys) are literally sick. Individuals with mental diseases (bad behaviors), like societies with economic diseases (bad fiscal policies), are metaphorically sick. The classification of (mis)behavior as illness provides an ideological justification for state-sponsored social control as medical treatment.

2. Separation of Psychiatry and the State. If we recognize that "mental illness" is a metaphor for disapproved thoughts, feelings, and behaviors, we are compelled to recognize as well that the primary function of Psychiatry is to control thought, mood, and behavior. Hence, like Church and State, Psychiatry and the State ought to be separated by a "wall." At the same time, the State ought not to interfere with mental health practices between consenting adults. The role of psychiatrists and mental health experts with regard to law, the school system, and other organizations ought to be similar to the role of clergymen in those situations.

3. Presumption of competence. Because being accused of mental illness is similar to being accused of crime, we ought to presume that psychiatric "defendants" are mentally competent, just as we presume that criminal defendants are legally innocent. Individuals charged with criminal, civil, or interpersonal offenses ought never to be treated as incompetent solely on the basis of the opinion of mental health experts. Incompetence ought to be a judicial determination and the "accused" ought to have access to legal representation and a right to trial by jury.

4. Abolition of involuntary mental hospitalization. Involuntary mental hospitalization is imprisonment under the guise of treatment; it is a covert form of social control that subverts the rule of law. No one ought to be deprived of liberty except for a criminal offense, after a trial by jury guided by legal rules of evidence. No one ought to be detained against his will in a building called "hospital," or in any other medical institution, or on the basis of expert opinion. Medicine ought to be clearly distinguished and separated from penology, treatment from punishment, the hospital from the prison. No person ought to be detained involuntarily for a purpose other than punishment or in an institution other than one formally defined as a part of the state's criminal justice system.

5. Abolition of the insanity defense. Insanity is a legal concept involving the courtroom determination that a person is not capable of forming conscious intent and, therefore, cannot be held responsible for an otherwise criminal act. The opinions of experts about the "mental state" of defendants ought to be inadmissible in court, exactly as the opinions of experts about the "religious state" of defendants are inadmissible. No one ought to be excused of lawbreaking or any other offense on the basis of so-called expert opinion rendered by psychiatric or mental health experts. Excusing a person of responsibility for an otherwise criminal act on the basis of inability to form conscious intent is an act of legal mercy masquerading as an act of medical science. Being merciful or merciless toward lawbreakers is a moral and legal matter, unrelated to the actual or alleged expertise of medical and mental health professionals.

6. In 1798, Americans were confronted with the task of abolishing slavery, peacefully and without violating the rights of others. They refused to face that daunting task and we are still paying the price of their refusal. In 1998, we Americans are faced with the task of abolishing psychiatric slavery, peacefully and without violating the rights of others. We accept that task and are committed to working for its successful resolution. As Americans before us have eventually replaced involuntary servitude (chattel slavery) with contractual relations between employers and employees, we seek to replace involuntary psychiatry (psychiatric slavery) with contractual relations between care givers and clients.

Thomas Szasz March 1998

 http://www.szasz.com/

"One of the unpardonable sins, in the eyes of most people, is for a man to go about unlabelled. The world regards such a person as the police do an unmuzzled dog, not under proper control."